Sunday Ramblings: Father’s Day

Today I re-read a Father’s Day post I wrote a couple of years ago (on my personal blog). It made me cry. I drafted this post, deleted it, re-wrote it and then deleted it again. Third time round, I’ve decided to publish it with an extract from the original. I’m back again with Sunday ramblings…I hope this may be comforting for a few, knowing you’re not the only one feeling a bit wobbly today.

dad

When I was 15 he left us and I haven’t seen him since.  I’m now 36 and it still hurts. 

Fathers day is always painful for me, just like on my wedding day when my brother walked me down the aisle instead of him. My dad has never met my husband or my two children.

The truth is, We have no idea where he is, if he’s alive or not.

My sister, Angie hurts the most. She was his shadow, she loved to follow him everywhere when we were kids. I often think she has a big empty hole in her heart. I wish he’d come back, if only for a day, even if it was just to give her a cwtch and say he missed her.

I don’t have many photographs of him, i wish i did. It would help me remember all the good times.

To all those that still have their dad, tell him you love him. I wish I could mine.

dad2(left to right: me, my dad, my sister & my brother)

Today, is all about celebrating those amazing Dads that are there through thick and thin or remembering those who once were. My kids are currently on a bike ride with theirs, no doubt laughing their socks off too. For me, I’m celebrating a special kind of (wo)man. One that took on the role of Mum & Dad. Happy Fathers Day Mum! I know its been one hell of a bumpy ride over the years and things have been a lot harder than they should have. Your strength and love inspires me greatly. It gives me the courage to take my crazy ideas and run with them (including setting up my own Photography business & Cwtch the Bride) For that, I thank you. Love you so much xxx

me&mum(me & my mum)

Having photographed many weddings over the years where many fathers weren’t present. I’ve come to the conclusion that there’s no such thing as a ‘normal family’. I love that mine is weird and wonderful. Its what makes it so special. And if you are worried about your dad not being there on your wedding day, I know how difficult it’s going to be. But just remember… You are marrying the man you fell in love with.

my wedding day(Me & My Husband on my wedding day. Photo credit: Neil Weekes).

Roll on seven years from my wedding day and i’m truly thankful for my amazing family, my in-laws and all the great friends I have in my life right now. my crazy familyEspecially these 3 men below :)

family 1

I love them to the moon and back
family 2

If you are feeling a bit wobbly today, feel free to share your story in the comments box. I was ridiculously nervous about posting this.

4 thoughts on “Sunday Ramblings: Father’s Day

  1. I took a five minute tea break from DIY and you’ve got me in tears. I’m not as close to my dad as I could (should) be, but I can remember being his shadow when I was a little girl and I was so proud to walk (run?) down the aisle with him on my wedding day. Having said that, mine is a weird and wonderful family too and there’s nothing wrong with that!

    Big Cwtch xxx

  2. I am lucky as have a fantastic dad who is also one of my best friends. However I have a lot of close friends who don’t have fathers and some who don’t have good relationships with them. This is an inspiring post Maria. Your mum is obviously an amazing, strong woman, which must be where you get it from!

    You’re absolutely right when you say no family is normal. There are lots and lots of brides who don’t have fathers to walk them down the aisle or give a speech, but there is no such thing as normal anymore and weddings are about celebrating the love between you and you life partner and with the family and friends who mean the most to you.

    Brilliant post xx

  3. Beautiful post Maria. I know something of how you must feel today. My father left us to begin a new life in America when I was 13, apparently he didn’t think we ‘needed him’ anymore. I may not have felt I did after my parents divorce, but I damn well know my 15 year old brother did. Over the years we have tried to maintain a relationship, but when my brother died it became a watershed moment and I decided I did not want to see my father again.
    As you say, there is no such thing as a normal family, but having a husband who is an amazing father to your kids really is the greatest gift for a person who feels they were deserted by theirs. xxx

  4. In tears reading this. My dad left before I was born and yet still there’s an empty hole in my heart. I had father figures in my life and my mum is clearly brilliant but it’s still there. All my live today on wobble day, there’s plenty of us wobbling with you x

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